I can feel myself slipping into that pit again. Isolation, depression, sadness. I can't fend off the tears.

At what point do you stop making things good for everyone else and go after what you really want? At what point does it not matter what you're capable of, but what path you want to take?

Try as I may to hype myself up about the coming changes, it doesn't seem to be working. Everything is falling by the wayside so that I can rightfully give this my all, but it's not because it's what I want to do.

It's because it's what everyone knows I'm capable of doing.

And I have a feeling that by the time I finally slow down in life and stop trying to make everything better and free of trouble, stress, hurt, and pain for everyone else, it will be too late to do anything about me.

*sigh*